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Analysis Summary
Worth Noting
Positive elements
- This video provides a humorous critique of tech marketing jargon and the perceived stagnation of legacy hardware manufacturers.
Be Aware
Cautionary elements
- The use of 'revelation framing' (mocking what companies 'don't want you to know') is used for comedy here, but is a common tool for actual misinformation in other contexts.
Influence Dimensions
How are these scored?About this analysis
Knowing about these techniques makes them visible, not powerless. The ones that work best on you are the ones that match beliefs you already hold.
This analysis is a tool for your own thinking — what you do with it is up to you.
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Transcript
Hello. Yes. Could you please tell Apple to stop releasing new chips, please? [music] See, we only just caught up to their base M5 with our most powerful chip that runs so hot you could probably cook an egg on it. Oh, speaking of which, lunch is ready. Oh, hi there. I'm Sam Tucker from the cafeteria. And you may have heard recently that Apple just announced their all new M5 Pro and M5 Max MacBook Pros that perform amazingly compared to our chips that run on x86 year olds. Come on, grandma, pick up the pace. Anyway, Apple was able to make their chips more powerful through the power of marketing as their pro computers don't have lame and weak efficiency cores anymore. No, they have performance cores that just happen to be more efficient. And if they're called performance cores, then what are the more powerful cores called now? Well, of course, they're called super cores, which are totally different from performance cores. Even though Apple called them performance cores in the original M5, but I've been assured that Tim has personally broken into everyone's house to replace them so that Apple is now allowed to call them super cores. Apple also performed a little magic trick with their new Apple Fusion architecture where the CPU and GPU are separate dyes but are fused onto a single chip. So, Apple silicon used to be everything together, and now they're separate but touching, and with enough innovation, they'll be able to pull them so far apart that we're back to where we started. But we've been where we've started for years now. How come we're not successful? Looking at the charts, while most performance gains are okay, where their chips really zoom ahead is in AI and processing LLM. LLM, of course, stands for large lying model. And Apple was able to use their lying model to give people the impression that their computers now come with a free upgrade to double the starting storage. And all it cost them was more money. But come on, Apple. Did your chips have to be this good? At this point, you're just rubbing it in our face. Which is a little disrespectful, Apple. After everything we did for you, we baked the biggest chip in the world and [music] gave it to Steve on stage and all you had to do was build a computer big enough to fit it with a fan. The all new MacBook Pros with the new M5 chips. Where did Apple get the idea to make their own chips? Well, I smell an Intel. Oh crap, my egg. >> Subscribe today. >> Forget it. It's overcooked, guys. Get another chip and make me some bacon. Oh, hey everyone. Thanks for watching the video. And has Apple released their even more new small MacBook? I don't know. I'm from the past. I'm from Intel. We don't We can't see the future. We can't see the present. These are rosecoled glasses.
Video description
Apple just announced their new M5 Pro & M5 Max MacBook Pros and everyone is happy about it… except Intel. SUPPORT: https://funkytime.tv/patriot-signup/ MERCH: https://funkytime.tv/shop/ FUNKY TIME WEBSITE: https://funkytime.tv FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/SamtimeNews TWITTER: http://twitter.com/SamtimeNews INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/samtimenews ----------------------------------- 'Escape the ordinary. Embrace the FUNKY!' ----------------------------------- SAMTIME is a parody channel and does not represent the tech company featured. For sponsorship enquiries: samtime@bossmgmtgrp.com For other business enquiries: business@funkytime.tv Copyright FUNKY TIME PRODUCTIONS 2026