"The HARDEST Thing About Being A Dad" - Terrence Howard Gets Honest About Fatherhood

I know you always talk about being a father uh and it's typically, you know, last time we did the conversation, we didn't talk about this at all. It was complete different conversation. We had a scientist from NASA with us, which uh was a great combo. How important is it to you to be a father? >> The hardest thing about being a dad is not being a hypocrite, not being a phony. You know, you try and I I realize I'm talking to my son about things that he's watching, but at the same time, I'm hearing that for myself about things I shouldn't be watching. You know, I'm telling him to maintain his majestic comportment all the time or telling both of them, you know, rule number five, six, and seven, respect yourself, respect others, respect people's privacy. And then rule number four in our family is um don't be obnoxious. But then I go to Disney World, Disneyland, and I'm sitting there and I get triggered immediately because they want to grab my bags and they're going through my bags aggressively and putting my stuff down. >> Rule number four. >> Rule number four. And I get obnoxious and, you know, and throw attitude and I'm like, I wouldn't want my child to do that. That's all you talk about. Yeah, they caught me out about it. Not the kids didn't call me out, but the people did. They almost threw us out of Disneyland, you know. Only I didn't curse or anything like that, but I was I was I was angry back, too. >> They take the bag when you come in because someone's recently got stabbed at Disneyland. >> And this is LA. This is in LA. So, they're going through your bags literally like it's a serious search. >> And you know, Misos is out right now. So, at the time, I'm sitting there like, "Wait a minute. you're taking the rags that I that I'm going to blow my kids nose with and you're putting it on the same counter that you put everybody's bags. I like don't do that. Don't He was like, "Don't give me attitude." I was like, "Everybody's got attitude." >> He told you, "Don't give me." >> Yeah. And I'm like, "Um, and instead of taking a deep breath like I I do." >> Did he know where you were or No. Did he reckon? >> No, he didn't know. But >> but instead of taking a deep breath, Yeah. you know, and thinking about maybe he's having a hard day, I took it personal. I got triggered and then I'm like talking to everybody out in the world about maintaining your majestic compartment, being calm, ABC, always be cool, always be calm, always be comfortable with the consequences of your choices. And here my family almost lost the opportunity to be there because I lost my cool. So, I hate being a hypocrite as a father, you know. I hate not having the compassion to show the better side of me. So, that's the hardest thing. >> What are the rules? What were the rules? >> Oh, it's there's nine rules. Rule number one, >> yeah, >> put on your shoes, which means take care of your foundation. Make sure you're in a a secure place. Rule number two, stay out of the find the shade. It's find the shade. >> What does that mean? Well, in Southern California, it's a lot of heat. So, stay out of the heat. But figuratively, it means find cover. So, later on when my children are older, I'll be able to say, "Number two," and they'll know to find the shade. They'll know to get out of the way of danger. Number three, stay out of the streets. And that that's that tells itself. But number four is don't be obnoxious. Number five is respect yourself. Number six, respect others. >> Number seven, respect people's privacy. Number eight, no head shot. You know, if you're going to punch your brother, punch him in the chest. Punch him in the leg. >> Literally, that's one of the >> Yeah. No punching. No, no punching above the neck. No punching above the neck. >> No head shots. My boys have broken that one a few times. >> And number nine is make way for life. You know, respect all living things. And I I follow that one for the most part a lot. But you know, I sometimes disrespect myself. I sometimes don't respect people's privacy, you know. So I try my hardest not to get caught up in gossip about somebody else all the time. So I'm learning. These are my own rules that I if I can live by them, my children can live. >> What What What was it? Cuz growing up, how many siblings was it? Was it you and your two brothers or >> There's 11 of us. There's 11 of you. Okay. So, I know there there's uh I know a couple of the names that I looked up. So, 11 total. >> 11. >> Same mom and dad. >> No, only four of us from the same mom and dad. >> Four. Same mom and dad. Okay. What uh experiences as a kid growing up uh uh changed the way you said, "I'm not going to parent like this. I'm going to be a father like this." Or, "I'm going to be a father just like uh I was fathered." What What experiences impacted your parenting? Well, my father I mean I was encouraable. I was you I was you couldn't I was indomitable as a child. So you tell me to do something I'm going to I'm going to do it just because you told me not to do it. You know you don't have authority over me. So um I got whooped every day by my father. So I told myself when I have my children I'm not going to whoop them. I'm not going to use corporal punishment on them. I'm not going to do any of that. But that's not what I ended up doing because you start talking to them a thousand times and they don't listen. And then immediately you go back to the slave days and you're like, well, let me go get the let me go get the whip. Let me go get the belt. Let me do all of this other stuff you're not supposed to do. But you find yourself still back into those places and you have to catch yourself, especially with the laws that's out here today. So now um because I got the the benefit had the benefit of you know doing some discipline before now if I'm walking upstairs to get the belt then they straighten themselves out and I don't have to actually apply the belt but it's hard. How do you raise young boys you know that are indomitable to respect authority and respect themselves and you know it's it's a it's a tight balance. Hi everyone, my name is Terren Howard. I'm an actor um but in the field of science also. So if you would like to connect with me, you can connect with me on connect. Um the QR code is down below and let's have a great conversation. >> If you enjoy this video, you want to watch more videos like this, click here. And if you want to watch the entire podcast, click here.

Terrence Howard opens up to Patrick Bet-David about his 9 rules for raising his kids, the challenge of practicing what you preach as a dad, and how growing up in a house of 11 shaped his approach to fatherhood. ------- ▶️ WATCH THE FULL EPISODE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9rfWYCXbYA Ⓜ️ MINNECT WITH TERRENCE HOWARD: https://bit.ly/42k9hZ2 Ⓜ️ CONNECT ON MINNECT: ⁠⁠https://bit.ly/4kSVkso Ⓜ️ PBD PODCAST CIRCLES: https://bit.ly/4mAWQAP 👔 BET-DAVID CONSULTING: https://bit.ly/4lzQph2 🥃 BOARDROOM CIGAR LOUNGE: https://bit.ly/4pzLEXj 💬 TEXT US: Text “PODCAST” to 310-340-1132 to get the latest updates in real-time! SUBSCRIBE TO: ​⁠ @VALUETAINMENT @ValuetainmentComedy @HerTakePod ABOUT US: Patrick Bet-David is the founder and CEO of Valuetainment Media. He is the author of the #1 Wall Street Journal Bestseller “Your Next Five Moves” (Simon & Schuster) and a father of 2 boys and 2 girls. He currently resides in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.