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Lovers by Shan · 3.0K views · 204 likes Short
Analysis Summary
Ask yourself: “Did I notice what this video wanted from me, and did I decide freely to say yes?”
Worth Noting
Positive elements
- This video provides a credible neurobiological perspective on how high-stimulus media can affect real-world interpersonal desire.
Be Aware
Cautionary elements
- The clinical pathologizing of a hobby (reading) is used as a direct bridge to sell the guest's specific books and courses.
Influence Dimensions
How are these scored?About this analysis
Knowing about these techniques makes them visible, not powerless. The ones that work best on you are the ones that match beliefs you already hold.
This analysis is a tool for your own thinking — what you do with it is up to you.
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Transcript
I am Playboy's adviser and there was one question that I got asked that I think that you would have a great response to. My girlfriend reads a ton of those smutty novels on her Kindle, but our real life sex life is practically non-existent. If I were reading that stuff all day, I imagine I'd be pretty horny. Or maybe she's not horny because she's reading smut all day. I don't want to shame her or anything, but something's got to give. >> Romance novels, erotica is in many ways sexually sanctioned pornography for women. And I think the extent to which you know people can get addicted to erotic novels and and romance novels has been underappreciated as you know as I talk about in the class on masterclass and also my book dopamine nation I talk about my own um addiction to um romance novels erotica and it is very true whether it's romance novels or pornography or other um types of sexual activities outside of our intimate partnership that it can come to displace um our interest in our partners. So this guy sensing that the romance novels and the erotica is kind of displacing their sexual intimacy. He's absolutely right. But the the bad news, potentially bad news here is that if she were to give up those romance novels, she would probably go through a period of withdrawal. And it might actually take a long time for her to rekindle her um interest in and ability to have sex with him.
Video description
“My girlfriend reads smut constantly… but our sex life is basically nonexistent. What gives?” Dr. Anna Lembke explains that romance novels and erotica can function as sexually sanctioned p**n*graphy. Like any high-dopamine stimulus, that kind of content can begin to compete with and sometimes displace desire within a relationship. When does fantasy stop being harmless and start affecting intimacy? ________________________ Advertising & Other Inquiries: team@loversbyshan.com